Fridays I'm in Love
On Fridays on my way to work, I see the same man walking toward the cemetery with a huge bunch of flowers. I only see him if I go to work after dropping off the girls, but like clockwork, he is there with his fisherman's vest on, and that bright bundle of flowers. Every time I see him, I can't help but smile. But it's a bittersweet smile.
Why? Because he's visiting a loved one that he's lost. Was it his sweetheart? Most likely. My Lola visited Lolo at the cemetery for seventeen years. That's a long time to live without one's soulmate.
This cemetery happens to be right near my work, and also happens to be the one we almost had Macy buried in. It's a Catholic cemetery and it's nearby, but in the end I couldn't imagine her being far away from my Lola.
October is Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness month and there are many walks being held in honor of our little ones. We are missing this year's OC Walk to Remember as my sister is getting married this weekend. But, I like to think that we'll have a moment for her too.
You see, even after all this time, even after my rainbow baby and my older baby, there's still something missing from our family. There's still someone missing from our family, and it's little Macy button.
As I've said before, in some ways, it gets harder to talk about Macy the longer it's been that she's gone. It doesn't change the fact that she would be eight-turning-nine years old this year. It doesn't change the fact that I've lived through her loss.
Forever Footprints sponsors walks like this to raise money to help support families faced with infant loss. They have support groups, make sibling backpacks, and so much more for the community. I wish I could be there this year at the OC Walk to Remember like last year to celebrate with families, to connect with other families, to further Macy's legacy. Instead, in my heart, I'll be there with you.
And I'll feel as if I'm walking side-by-side by my Friday stranger. Taking the steps that our loved ones no longer can.
For more information, please visit Forever Footprints or Special Delivery or see our book grouping of books about infant loss. And if you have a friend or family member who has lost a child (no matter how old) or who has had a miscarriage (or 3), please feel free to reach out to them with a kind word this month.
xo
