Confession Time!
I've noticed in my blogging that I tend to write 'confessions'. I'm not sure why--maybe it's part of rambling blog-style nature. Here's a confession that you may or may not be surprised by: I've gone to therapy.
And I'm proud of myself for choosing to do so. My confession today is two-fold: I'm here to say therapy helps. And also to say that there is nothing wrong with going to therapy. And nothing wrong with someone who goes to therapy.
Here's the background: I've always been open to therapy. I've always thought it's a great option. I've also met many people who are NOT open to therapy for various reasons.
So when I found myself feeling overwhelmed with my grief around three months after Macy died, I sent out my calls. I contacted my primary care doctor and I contacted the perinatal comfort care program nurse (Suzanne Engelder) who took such great care of our little family during my difficult pregnancy and beyond.
It was one of the best decisions I made—no regrets. I also have no regrets with any of our decisions regarding Macy, but maybe I should say that this decision was for me and Mini Me. Mini Me was 2 years old when Macy was born. She was 2 and 3 and 4 on up when I was dealing with my grief in all its stages. And I didn’t want to have her memories of me crying every single day. (Which happened—just sometimes not in front of her. I wasn’t hiding my grief. I just didn’t want all her toddler memories to be tainted with Macy and not other things.)
Therapy was great. Dr. V and I met on Friday mornings, and I brought my coffee, and it almost felt like I was having coffee with a new non-judgmental friend. One that was even more needed as I planned for and became pregnant with Little Lion, which brought on a maelstrom of emotions.
Mental Health and Quarantine
You may imagine that it’s been tough mentally for a lot of people due to quarantine.
It’s been especially tough on our teens and kids.
And rightly so. They’ve been yanked from normality with the same uncertainties that we have. On top of that, especially for our middle and high schoolers, this is the time when PEERS and SOCIAL INTERACTION is integral to their growth.
And, just like for us, the zoom meetings and Facetimes aren’t cutting it.
If you are concerned about your child, please reach out to your child’s pediatrician for resources. Now is NOT the time to wait.
It’s important to see a professional, just like it’s important to see your doctor if you’re concerned about a broken bone or sprained ankle.
I’ve written here before about mental health, about how every day I meet an Evan Hansen or Connor Murphy. And I feel it. I worry about these kids and I check up on these kids because even though I haven’t been in your shoes, I’ve been in your neck of the woods. I have. And I know what it feels like to have someone on your side. That someone is me. Please reach out. You are not alone.
For more support or info:
ETA: CHOC Childrens blogpost specifically about the pandemic and mental health
CHOC Chldrens and Mental Illness
CHOC Childrens regarding Suicide and Kids
National Suicide Prevention Lifeline
NotOkApp —a free mental health app